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Drunken haiku vault

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Moby-Dick in haiku

 

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04.17.06-05.16.06

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author's note
how do you like me so far?

when i decided to go all haiku all the time, i asked myself one big question: how long do you think you can last? a month? a couple of months? i didn't know. in the back of my mind i was thinking maybe six months tops. yet here i am, a year to the day later. still here. yay me.

at first it seemed easy. ideas came fast and furious, so fast and furious i had to jot them down in one of those whatchamacallit notebooks. ok, so some of it was not so great, but i posted them anyway under the theory that even the Giants have their off days. some of it was so crappy they'll never see the light of day. for example:

fifty years ago
ginsberg read a poem aloud
and atoms were smashed

or

i went to a concert
next to me sat a one-armed vet
the sound of one hand clapping

you get the picture.

these days the ideas don't come so fast or furious -- not even the bad ones. maybe that's a good thing. unironically, a year later i find myself asking the same vexatious question: how long? but if it means anything, my domain name is paid up till 2011. i guess that makes me an optimist.

 

Posted 04.17.07|

 


author's note
don't hang your chad

meg over at simply nutmeg (who apparently guzzles cheapass beer while writing kickass haiku and listening to the nationals REALLY LOUD) did me the honor the other day of nominating me for a bloggers choice award. that right there shows she's got a wicked sense of humor. about the only title i've ever garnered was Most Likely to Fall Down and Go Boom back in high school. but then, i was unopposed. this time there's some stiff competition. or put another way, there's some stiffs in the competition. so please go vote for this stiff. pretend i'm that guy sanjaya but without all the hair. you can vote right here. and oh yeah, if you go to all the trouble to register, please stuff the ballot box for meg too. you can do that here.

 

Posted 04.14.07|

 


keep the net free of civility!*

your thoughts are precious
so long as you are thinking
the same thoughts as me

 

*Please comment, inserting profanity where appropriate.

Posted 04.12.07|

 

Free Kathy Sierra
Tim O'Reilly's really dumb idea
Only you can prevent forest fires or something

The Best (or Worst) of MadHaiku Vol. 2

After Birth

I like Katie Holmes
But when it comes to her placenta
I'm strictly vegetarian

Posted 4.19.06|


britney por vida

britney oh britney
will you be mine
soon as you learn to drive

Posted 11.13.06|

 

Geraldo's Blog Entry

"I wanted the news.
Anxious, I flipped on the boob tube.
Ugh, Katie Couric!"

Posted 6.06.06|

 

A Bad Day at the Office

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck
fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck
fuckfuckfuckfuckit

Posted 7.28.06|



Another True Confession

When I get hammered
I like to sing along to
really sappy songs

Posted 7.15.06|

 


those wacky easter eggs

the eggs are quiet
sitting inside their basket
then they all get fried

 

Posted 04.08.07|

 

My encounter with Hilary Duff (stuff)

bird of paradise

crane on the table
the paper is its essence
so origami

 

Posted 04.05.07|

 


grammatize this*

some new adjectives
make me sad to be alive
and adverbs suck too!

 

Posted 04.01.07|

 

*plagarized from ben yagoda

Urban Dictionary

u.s. attorney general, heh*

i am alberto
i cluck like a chicken
'cept this hen got no huevos

 

Posted 03.29.07|


*for the pineapple princess



implements of love (or hate)

Pen
ink
Paper

Posted 03.26.07|

 

More funner than Etch-O-Sketch -- try it!

oil addiction

dude in a hummer
gas-guzzling asshole
osama loves you

 

Posted 03.22.07|

 

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